Sunday, September 4, 2011

sometimes I forget that I am not Chinese...

I have officially been in China for about two weeks, I am a day early in saying this...but close enough. I still have my days where I see people from a distance talking and my instinct is to think they are speaking english, they are not. I get lots of stares and people looking at me like I am crazy for doing what they do. Everyone I meet asks me why I am here, their responses are always shocked ones when I tell them why I am here and what I love about Shenzhen. I do a lot of walking, a lot might be an understatement. I walk 95% of the time and the other 5% of the time is spent taking the metro and occasionally a taxi (but that is only if I get lost.) The stares I get...I forget why someone would be staring at me, because I am different and I am doing everything that someone who is a native, sees as normal for themselves, not me. But I am learning that the looks just come with me being here, I don't expect them to change or for them to stop, I am enjoying it, all I can do right now is keep smiling. I can't wait until I can learn more Chinese and then really scare the people that stare because I am a foreigner! maybe they will accept me as a "native" that looks different for this next year!

So I still have terrible homesickness but it is nothing compared to the first week, that week I thought I was going to be back in the states in no time and was not enjoying anything about being in China again. I have adjusted and I am slowly enjoying what I am doing and embracing any and all situations. My strength is in Him and I am constantly reminded of that and put him first in all situations and have been trying my hardest to constantly be in the word and to be talking to our Father. It is the one thing that gets me up in the morning and gets me through my day and I love closing my day before bed in His word. I am constantly amazed and all of his wonder and grace and love that he has for us. My strength lies in him and I have seen that time and time again, especially in these last two weeks and I love it.

I got to go to the Chinese Christian Church in Shenzhen (a state registered church) and attend their new foreign service, which was quite a story. I really enjoyed what the two leaders are trying to do and I hope I can be there helping them start a community that the church has asked them to do. I met three other foreigners there who are helping them and really got to talk to them and enjoy their company and I hope that I can help them in any way possible. So I am going to attend for a few weeks and see what they might want me to do or see if there is anything for me to do. I am excited to hopefully build a community with them!

The week has been busy, had my first classes! they went really well and felt really natural and I love the kids already! they asked questions and I showed them pictures of me and family and friends and just my life in general and they really enjoyed that! I even gave them a little bit of homework :) such a mean teacher, I know... :D Work is tough I have 10 hour days with 5 hours of them sitting at the office, so I am working on reading and keeping myself busy. Lessons are done for a few weeks already, its all just a lot of sitting!! but school is going well, just trying to get used to the 6:30 am wake up call. and not to oversleep! I teach 3 classes a day in the afternoon mon, tue, wed and fri and on Thursday I have a after school program where we can do whatever we want, just have to make sure we are practicing english! I am excited for that to start, in a few weeks.

the exciting thing this weekend was going to a work banquet to celebrate Teacher's day! I won a rice cooker! and I got to meet a lot of other foreign teachers and watch a show and watch my teachers and the teachers from this summer go up and sing and dance, it was a really fun night. It did not end there though we went to KTV (Karaoke) after for 3 hours! I thought I was going to die! but the school accepted me as a colleague that night! lots of singing and laughing but I did not get home till 1 in the morning...I feel like an old person now, wanting to be in bed by 8!

I also have been given the opportunity to help some students with english that are friends, so it is kind of like babysitting, but doing it in english. Jess and I will take on 6 four year olds next weekend, I am STOKED! and I have some other opportunities with other kids as well, just trying to figure out times and such. These kids make my heart very happy, their smiles just make me want to hang out with them all the time lol but I can't, I need to make sure I am making time for myself and to be fed by Him and stay in the word and have my day of rest! so staying focused on that but helping as many as I can without being worn out! I can do it!

everything is going well, enjoying who I am meeting and what I have been doing, I miss home very very very much but I am dealing with it and living in the now and embracing the situations I am being handed right now. I know that He is there with me and has many reasons for me to be here and I am just trying to listen and be patient and figure out what exactly I should be doing, without wearing myself out.

I thank you for your constant encouragement, without them I would still be a mess.

I love you all

Ashley

High of the week: Mastering the subway system and meeting the foreigners at the church.

Low of the week: being really tired and still being super homesick (I am hoping that can become a healthy homesick in the future, if that even exists!)


Prayer Requests:
Be able to survive 10 hour work days, its hard.
That I can be intentional in the communities that I am in.
That I can figure out how to cook!
Continue to be in the word and praying for you all back home.
that I don't become overworked.

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